Beloved 2010



I have found eternity orbiting the earth in the now.
My Love for you is not in past days gone by,
Even though I loved you yesterday and the days before.

My Love for you is not held in future days,
Even though I will Love you tomorrow and evermore.

I Love you  encapsulated in eternity
I Love you  this very sacred hour.
I Love you  in and beyond this world
Eternal        beautiful        now.

15th March 2010

The crucifixion

Bearing the weight of the cross
Dragging through hopeless hope and humiliation
Until broken of all physical strength
Collapsing.  Prayers aspiring.
Nailed to the very wood with the iron will of Love enduring
The wood once nurtured from the clay, made oxygen for life.
Starving now of any of natures merciful spirit
The stab of human nature piercing the side
The side with the innocent guard down.  The inside.
Everyone who ever failed to Love, modestly shrinking away in self preservation.
Blood red, like teardrops which cannot be contained
A visual outpouring of Love.

What is Love ?
That your body be broken up for me ?
That your blood be sacrificed for me ?
That your sacrament is denied me ?
God is this yours or human will ?
I Love where lesser hearts and souls have died
Yet I am being crucified.

There is another way:- My way

Where all our days could be blessed with loving kindness
A lifetime of intimate friendship, explored and shared.
Overflowing with support, kindred warmth and spiritual closeness.
Of understanding, respect, acceptance and compassion.
And Love of the very closest, eternal kind.
Held in friendship.
Love without sin.


And still I will bear the weight of my cross for eternity
For in truth, God will forever keep me close to you.
For God is Love, and I am too.

Feb 2010

The veil

Agnostic days of my upbringing
Give way to emerging spirals of hope
For I know so well, that in birth, in death, in Love, and in truth
The veil is stretched so fine
It is, as if it were pulled back to reveal
An ever patient, all encompassing, immortal Whole
Whose influence I live and ultimately die for.

In death, my Dad and I were blessed by your presence
And in return, and in reverse
As he, had done me the honour in life
I gave away my father in death.
In your patience almighty Father, you waited for me to be ready
I lay his hand in your hand
And in your gentleness, you gave me a privilege eternal.
I felt you touch my soul, I felt you hold my spirit.

In birth you came when I knew you would, at 27
An annunciation already proclaimed within the mind
And it was years past since I was told.
I still tried, and failed to prematurely override.
Then after 4 babes, and counting blessings
As death was all so close.
I knew too, there was another child.
Against all the will of my marriage, I knew.
And though the veil was drawn thin
Through the portal I told you, This life, I was not ready to depart.
But you knew, for there were matters of the heart.

Love a truth, only I cannot deny
Its deepness, by deeper deep does bless
Matters not in life or death.
For truth to which I have no veil
You lay bare my soul.
I Love, as you God have willed me to Love.
And in your plan, despite my blindness
You place my Love, where you can see it is needed.
And in your eternal plan
No matter what my will undoes
In patience, you do again and again.
It doesn’t matter how hard I try to extinguish your will
A candle lighting another candle
Looses nothing in its quest.
Until in your perpetual light I rest.

Despite man putting rules between you and I
Upon your will God
Pray I am forever blessed xxx

Jan 2010

My Love

I did not fall in Love with you.
In the very beginning He gave us life
He made us in His Love
In triune.
I feel not alone.
It was not my call
But my calling.
Through Him
With Him
In Him.
Your tender gentle being seeped into every part of my existence
Your sweetest heart held in the eternity of my days.
My life will never belong to me again.
It is His will that it forever belongs to you. X


November 09

Soul to Soul

For when death comes, He will not apologise
He will be all powerful and strong and sure,
Though before He takes me from my world.....

In my quietness, I want to lay skin to skin with you beneath the stars.

In my gentleness, I want to awake with you soul to soul.

In my soulfulness, I want to swim naked with you in the moonlight.

In my stillness, I want to breathe you in and breathe God back into you.

In my softness, I want to kiss your eyelids whilst you lay sleeping.

With all my care, I want to gently touch you, to soften your feelings, to awaken your heart, to warm your life.

Without any reason, I want to cradle your life in my Love, and breathe trust and closeness, and faith in Love, back into your life.

With all of my tenderness, I want to bless you with me
As I, have been blessed with you.

With The Holy Spirit, I want us to share promises and vows of eternity.
For when Love is eternal, life is eternal.

God is Love.

Only then with all my peace, will I truly know eternal life.

For with my heart and soul, I Love my dearest.
Beyond my soul, I Love only you.

And should my very prayer come true.

When death comes, I will not apologise.
I will be humble and all powerful and strong and sure…..
knowing God blesses True Love forever more x

Oct 26th 2009

For The Love of God

Silence upon silence upon silence.
I wait for God……
All I can find is myself.

I raise my heart up to God.
It is broken.
Better my broken heart, than no heart at all.

For the Love of God 2

Silence upon silence upon silence
God comes to me
In the Love, all around.

Oct 3rd 09

Simply life within












Summer of 09